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Writer's pictureSonal Sahani

the beautiful struggle of finding home when you don't belong


As a millennial who is passionately seeking life in travels, I didn't have a physical place to call home, but that doesn't mean I don't understand the struggle of finding a sense of belonging. It's a feeling that many of us have experienced at some point in our lives. Maybe you're an immigrant who moved to a new country, or maybe you've moved around a lot and never had a chance to settle down in one place. Perhaps you're part of a minority group and feel like you don't fit in with the dominant culture. Whatever the reason, the feeling of not belonging can be challenging and isolating.


For me, the question of "where are you from?" always triggers a mix of emotions. As a 1st generation Gujrati North Indian, I have a unique perspective on what it means to belong. I was born in Mumbai and spent my early teenage years there before immigrating to Pune. I look Asian, speak the language fluently, and know the customs, but I've always felt like there's an invisible gap between me and my North Indian identity. When I visit North India, I feel like a foreigner. When I'm in the Mumbai, I feel like an immigrant. It's a challenging place to be in, but I've come to realize that it's also a beautiful one.


The struggle of finding home when you don't belong is a universal one. We all have to be outsiders at some point in our lives, whether it's starting a new job or school, moving to a new city, or navigating a new social group. It can be uncomfortable and disorienting, but it's also an opportunity for growth and self-discovery. Through my experiences of not feeling like I belong, I've learned to embrace my uniqueness and recognize the different ways that I've created homes for myself along the way.


At times, I've tried to blend in and be like everyone else. I've changed the way I talk, dressed like my peers, and tried to fit in with the dominant culture. But the more I tried to fit in, the more I felt like an imposter. I realized that the only way to truly belong is by being my authentic self. It's okay to be different, to have multiple homes, and to be shaped by different experiences and cultures. The more I embraced my uniqueness, the more I found people who loved and accepted me for who I am.


Ultimately, the question of "where are you from?" doesn't matter as much as we think it does. We all have complex identities shaped by different experiences and cultures. Instead of trying to fit into a neat box, we should embrace our differences and recognize the beauty in the struggle of finding home. It's not always an easy path, but it's one that can lead to a greater sense of self-awareness, compassion, and connection with others who have experienced similar challenges.


In conclusion, the struggle of finding home when you don't belong is a beautiful one. It's an opportunity to embrace your uniqueness, connect with others, and recognize the different ways that you've created homes for yourself along the way. It's okay to be different, to have multiple homes, and to be shaped by different experiences and cultures. So, to anyone who feels like they don't belong, know that you're not alone. We've all been there, and it's through our struggles that we find strength, resilience, and a greater sense of self.

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